February 2006 Archives

SPINS AND SPIRALS

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I have been cheering and holding on as I watched the Olympics. I remember my daughter in the den with our quick dinners and friends sitting on the floor.

In my empty nest now, I am inspired by the athlete’s courage and strength. I got to the gym more and even looked for new exercise classes to kick it up.

I heard an interview with an athlete and since empty nest is on my mind, I saw a similarity.

She talked about finding some satisfaction. As we are in the transition and recovering from the spins and spirals of our kids leaving home, we long for satisfaction and hope.

Part of being a parent is accepting there will be times we are going to hurt. We have been in training with all their stages of life where they kept us up, they did things we definitely taught them not to, they didn’t call, they yelled at us and slammed the door, they made plans with out checking in with the family and the list goes on and on for each of us.

We thought we were in shape for them leaving the nest, since we knew it was coming. Sure we realized we would fall, get some bruises in the loneliness, but we didn’t think it would take so long to recover and heal. We hold the title “PARENTS” and we thought we could handle it all.

But here today and gone tomorrow, spun us into a whirl that we could not have trained for no matter what.

How could we not be aching when you love someone so much and they leave? How can you not miss that daily contact? Compassion for the pain helps us lift again into training for our next event.

The event called “reflect and revitalize my life!”

We will have moments of feeling lost in the spins and spirals of our empty nest. We will be developing more of our inner strength to pull ourselves up and get ourselves back after the fall.

“I’m going to keep looking for the positive.,” said Sasha Cohen, the figure skater,. She is 21 years old and had dreams of the gold. She sacrificed. She won and she lost along the ice. She took home the silver. She was real with her disappointment. She was hopeful with her future. She was grateful for where she was in life today.

Sasha Cohen and the other athletes were palpable to watch. They ignite my heart to honor all sides of life---sacrifice, determination, sorrow, loneliness, perseverance, doubt, dreams, gratitude and courage.

A dream to have a daily coach and massage wouldn’t be bad either, let alone their youth!

We all need curiosity, compassion, and others to inspire us to get up again after the fall. Let’s keep training, unfolding, and stepping towards our dreams. It’s not about getting a medal from our kids or the world, although, secretly, that would get me out of a spinning, spiraling day.

We are in training for healing, meaning and fun in the land of opportunity with other empty nesters Let’s go for the gold!

A member of the team, despite spins and spirals,

Natalie

THE NEW JOY OF EMPTY NEST

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News Flash! I am doing the wild thing that could only happen in empty nest. I am going to Europe to meet my daughter who is a junior and studying abroad.

We always had this dream, but it was a dream. Now, I am packing. She is so excited. It took courage and trust for me to leave my projects.

I feel so grateful that I can do this with her. After she graduates college next year, hopefully, she will get a job, move, and probably only have one week off. I don’t know that she will want to spend that week with me. She has a full life of deep friendships and love and in a year, she will have gathered more in her college nest.

Seizing the moment is what I often hear myself say, but never have I seized it this expansively. I think it is the benefit of being an empty nester for awhile and in being in my fifties. There is “it is my time” voice inside me.

Thank goodness my husband is compassionate and supportive. My friends say, “GO GIRL GO” and my daughter was begging me to make this long ago dream come true. “Just do it mom, they will understand.”

I have accumulated more than enough air miles. I have a passport.

When I told my dear friend, she asked me….”What did you do last week?” I named all my details of the project and work and family and house and exercise…”Oh, I get it…”exactly” she replied. None of that will be remembered like the memory of traveling in Europe with your amazing daughter who wants to have time with you.”

The voice in my head got louder….DON”T MISS THIS WINDOW WITH YOUR DAUGHTER.

So, I pass to all of you, reach a little, and kick up your heels and dream big. Just be ready to say yes after you go through the spinning dance of thinking you need to be responsible and take care of things or others, you can’t afford it and you can’t leave in the middle of…..or you will lose…..

PRIORITIES BECOME VERY CLEAR WHEN LOVE COMES CALLING!

Take good care, be gentle with yourselves and you know what…..give the responsible, good girl a vacation and wake up that wild woman for an adventure that is just for you. There are all kinds of adventures that might even be in your home town.

Bon Voyage Natalie

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This page is an archive of entries from February 2006 listed from newest to oldest.

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