October 2008 Archives

It has been an intense time. It is a time to review our core values. For me, when I remember that I am more than what I am in the midst of living, then I can be present with perseverance and hope.

- Review your talents.
- Check out how you are doing with your self-worth rather than allowing your inner critic to blind you.
- Get outside and look at the changing colors.
- Focus on what is working in your life.
- Speak up.
- Take baby steps for newness.
- Lower your expectations in order not to set yourself up for being hurt. Reality check helps.
- Differences allow for curiosity and compassion.
- Notice what limits you and stop the chatter. Stand tall.

I could go on and on with what I need to hear myself remember, but fortunately for you and for me, I need to get out the door.

LOVE THE LIFE YOU HAVE

Take good care,
Natalie
natalie@emptynestsupport.com
800-446-3310

I have been receiving sweet emails and calls from parents on the way to visiting their children at Parent’s Weekend and even calls when they are at the airport, leaving after a great visit.

They called me ahead of the event, wondering what their role will be. What changes will they experience and will they have those horrible tears, again? Oh, not tears from their children, but from their eyes, having to do the big hug goodbye, again…letting go, starting over.

But they feel it is all worth it. Parents called talking about meeting their children’s new friends and new parents, going to college lectures, tours of downtown, campus, and college museums, dining hall meals, sports events, concerts and of course, shopping.

They planned ahead to be as realistic as possible that changes will be present. Some children don’t have that many new friends. Some feel pressure to study even though their parents came to visit. Some won’t spend the night at the hotel with their parents because they have other plans. Some don’t want to be part of the campus events that weekend because they just want to do their own thing with their parents. Even if they made some plans with their children before the event, they realize plans will change, so lower your expectations of the “shoulds” and schedules.

I miss those weekends. I don’t feel tearful this year. I actually am smiling as I remember and relate to you the stories I have been hearing. My daughter graduated college, May, 2007. I understand the excitement and anxiety of it. Parents, grandparents and siblings, even the dog, all gather to peek into the life of their precious college kid. Rain or shine, they are wearing the college sweat shirt, proudly, as they follow their child across campus, clicking their digital cameras, hopefully being in the moment and not in the worry of letting go, again. Life will always bring changes, but hopefully Parent’s Weekend will be a Heavenly Day, as Patty Griffin sings, “tomorrow may bring sorrow, but let’s enjoy today, oh heavenly day.”

Have fun, families,
Natalie
natalie@emptynestsupport.com
800-446-3310
www.emptynestsupport.com